Fake: no way you’re getting through that many snickers in one sitting without vomiting your guts up.
Gay: anon is gay, everyone knows this.
this post was submitted on 12 May 2025
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Edit: actually no, I still don’t like this joke
Probably upside down to feel the vein.
Anon was there for the cock vein
I will never look at a snickers or mars bar the same way again.
Also, that photo clearly has a "candy warehouse" watermark. If the story was true, that would be a costco watermark.
For the record, I thought you were hilarious.
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Diabetes speedrun
This made me think of something that happened to a good friend of mine. He's in his 50s and is one of the most healthy people I know in terms of diet and exercise.
He went to the doctor the other day for a checkup. His doctor made an off the cuff remark about his cholesterol levels being normal, which was fine for a regular person by maybe a little concerning for a person with diabetes.
My friend was like "What do you mean for a person with diabetes?" and the doc responded "You didn't know you had diabetes?"
They went through my friend's diet to see what could be the cause. The conversation went like this:
Doc: Do you drink sugary drinks like soda?
Friend: Never.
Doc: What do you eat in a typical day?
Friend: Mostly rice and spinach. And beans too. Honestly most days I forget to eat.
Doc: This doesn't really check out. Are you sure there's nothing else you're eating or drinking?
Friend: Oh... I also usually drink about a gallon of orange juice a day.
So yeah ... that's the story of how my supposedly healthy friend gave himself diabetes by drinking a metric fuckton of OJ.
"somedays I don't even eat"
Mf getting all their calories from OJ
How were people brainwashed into thinking OJ was "healthy"? It's the closest equivalent to natural candy I can think of. Tons of sugar offset by juicy acidity
I mean, there are still obvious health benefits; you're going to get vitamins from OJ a can of soda will never give you. But, yeah, there are definitely, additionally, health detriments, as well.
Fruit is healthy. It's just fruit.
Whole fruit is healthy. The more processed you go, the less healthy it is. Interestingly, the more processed you go, the more calories you consume, too. You will eat more apple sauce than you will apples.
Exactly this.
Fructose adds to your intake of free (added) sugars. Whole fruit, on the other hand, does not.
Whole fruit contains fibre (roughage), vitamins and minerals, which are good for your overall health. The fibre helps to slow down the speed the fructose is absorbed into your blood stream and can help you feel fuller for longer. This is why it’s better to eat whole fruit, rather than fruit in the form of juice or a smoothie.
Fruit juice and smoothies, on the other hand, have most of the fibre (roughage) removed when they are made and it’s very easy to drink large quantities in a short space of time. This means you could be drinking a lot of extra calories, carbs and sugar.
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Yeah, but despite being diabetic I can't live without apple butter. To be fair that's why I get the "no granulated sugar added" stuff from Amish country. Depending on the brand, no more than four ingredients (apples, apple cider, lemon juice, spices), though my preferred brand only has three (no lemon juice). Way better quality than most other kinds too - you get more of the tartness of the apples because the only sweetener is more apple and they use less of the apple cider to sweeten than they otherwise might because you can only take it so far before it messes with the texture or flavor too much (which isn't as much a problem for most other sweeteners) and it costs more.
Amish Wedding, Jake & Amos and Yoder's all have good ones. The jar I finished off with my breakfast this morning was 5g carb/tablespoon, which is pretty low for apple butter.
Same idea for jams and jellies - particularly fond of Mrs. Miller's no granulated sugar added jams, which get sweetened with fruit juice (which in turn has price/flavor/texture limits on how much you can use and still have a good product). Whereas actual sugar free jams by the major brands tend to be godawful with entirely the wrong texture and flavor - Smucker's sugar free jams are an insult to the fruit they were at some point walked past during their production.
Related is that things that use unusual or expensive sugar sources (think agave nectar or honey as the primary or only sweetener as opposed to cane sugar, HFCS or something like that) tend to use less for price reasons and so tend to be slightly less horrific on the added sugar front.
Yeah, "home-processed" levels of processing ain't so bad. It's just interesting that the effects of food processing are measurable even between seemingly small changes. Pretty much, if you take any food and throw it in a blender, you'll eat more of it.
So yeah … that’s the story of how my supposedly healthy friend gave himself diabetes by drinking a metric fuckton of OJ.
Worth noting that drinking all that OJ also essentially means his blood sugar could not be properly measured by some of the testing methods used, because high levels of vitamin C interfere. I wear a CGM and it warns me every time I put on a new sensor not to consume more than 500mg of vitamin C per day if I want it to work, which is much less than a gallon of OJ. Same applies to most common glucometers. Unless they checked his blood sugar using a lab test that didn't involve a redox reaction, it's good odds that his blood sugar was not actually whatever it tested as. They likely had to make him swear off the OJ for a day or so and then rerun it to get a real number.
For reference, type I, was at 421 when diagnosed back in the 90s, blood sugar has never been higher than that though I did have one serious hypoglycemic incident where it managed to get low enough that it wasn't measurable, after they started a glucose IV I came to when it got up to about 35. Closest I've ever been to dying.
I have about 2 hours of lost time from that incident, during which I drove a total of about 20 miles between at least two trips. No coherent memory of that period, just a few flashes - I remember the steering wheel in my hands and the pressure of the pedal against my foot, I remember the Sheriff's Department logo sideways, I remember someone in medium blue, like a work uniform or maybe scrubs or something similar said something to me and I said something back (I don't remember what either of us said) and then it was two hours after my last coherent memories and I'm in the back of an ambulance with a glucose IV in one arm, an EMT on that side pricking my finger to check my blood sugar and it coming up 35, and EMT on the other side squeezing a tube of glucose paste into my mouth that tasted like a tin can in all the worst ways. The EMT noticed me looking at him and started asking general awareness questions, seemed a bit worried that my answer to where I was was "in the back of a parked ambulance, but I'm not sure where the ambulance is." Car was totaled, thankfully no one was hurt. I think whatever part of me was still capable of decision making was trying to get help, since I wrecked very close to a hospital ER that would require me to drive out of my usual way to get to.
I was absolutely like this, juice addicted, then I transitioned into full blown alcoholism, and on the way back out I had to acknowledge serious hypoglycemia and my body had to dry itself out and get used to more stable blood sugar.
Honestly tho I have not ever been able to control my addiction to sugar since, except during keto (boo) and on semiglutide, and suddenly it's manageable.
Oh. Will I get diabetes from Lipton peach ice tea?
That depends. How many gallons would you say you drink a day?
I don't know about gallons but 1.5 liters
That's a beetus
That's about 87 grams of sugar, which is about 3 times the recommended sugar daily intake for an adult male. Which roughly translates to, as bollybing put it, a beetus.
The packaging writes 0g per 250ml, they use artificial sweeteners in Turkey
Somehow, that also feels incorrect. There’s gotta be natural sugars still left in it, otherwise it’d just be “artificial” lemonade, right?
Or do they mean/say “0g of sugar added”? Why specify per 250ml then?
You've never seen all of those "zero" sodas and the likes? The ice tea will likely just have peach aroma and an onslaught of artificial sweeteners.
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finally achieved the hyperglycemic shock
I thought for a moment this was meant to imply the display was actually plastic and anon had given himself some exciting new kind of poisoning... no it's just diabetes
You are now addicted to snickers, if you stop eating them cold turkey you will die
“This… is Anon.” A 30-year-old man who ate 48 Snickers bars in one sitting.
He thought he was just indulging in a treat from Costco. But within hours, his hands began to tremble, his fingers and toes throbbed in pain, and a chill took over his body. He didn’t know it yet… but his pancreas was working overtime, and his blood sugar levels were spiraling out of control.
What happened next would leave doctors stunned—and teach us a shocking truth about what happens when you overdose on candy bars.
This is what happens if you eat an entire display case of Snickers.
-Chubbyemu (probably)
it would take more than one display case…
That’s what happened when I eat Chinese food. Only Chinese food. It’s weird.
It’s because they typically put a lot of sugar in it when cooking for westerns. Lots of sugar, carbs, and oil equals sugar crash and gout
Sounds like you're eating westernized chinese food. Get some authentic Chinese cuisine. Pick a region and go nuts, my personal favorite is Southwestern Chinese food.
I once violently hit a shroom vape from some bumfuck smoke shop and it did that to me. I saw, after the high set in, that the box said “Do not intended for human consumption”
hashtag satisfied
Anon so hungry they're not even being me
Been shopping at Metro recently, stumbled over a sign for Snickers with a >€100 price tag. It was a seriously big box with 10kg.
That'd be 4 of those OP's boxes, 192 bars, €0.52 each, good deal as far as I'm concerned.
Sorry Anon but you have theobromine poisoning. Seizures are imminent and you'll be lucky to slip into a coma before the arrhythmia starts and your heart stops permanently.
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