this post was submitted on 06 Jun 2025
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[–] [email protected] 107 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

You know what? I’m convinced. Flawless logic.

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[–] ininewcrow 68 points 2 weeks ago (5 children)

I don't need a machete to milk a cow

[–] [email protected] 22 points 2 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 weeks ago

Speak for yourself.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

i mean it certainly makes it more expedient

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

The re-milk value is much lower that way

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

It's also harder to keep the blood separated from the milk.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

that's a selling point, the blood makes you manlier (no no, that's not hepatitis, MANLY men have yellow skin)

[–] ininewcrow 3 points 2 weeks ago

Reminds me of a terrible factoid I read a long time ago .... they feed young calves they raise for veal a steady diet of cow's milk mixed with liquefied rendered cow blood and other bio fluids.

We might not have the matrix or dystopian futures yet ... but we sure are on our way to building one.

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

just get another cow? are you fucking poor or something?

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

.... I'll have to apologize to a lot of cows

[–] ininewcrow 23 points 2 weeks ago

I'm guessing you also enjoy your whipped cream ....

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[–] usualsuspect191 66 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Diogenes: "Behold, a hamster!" holds up coconut

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[–] [email protected] 26 points 2 weeks ago (9 children)
[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Not necessarily (platypus).

Biggest differentiator between the coconut and the hamster is the obvious lack of nipples.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

What also floats in water?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Former member of Atomic Kitten and Sugababes Heidi Range!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago

breathes in oxygen
breathes out carbon dioxide
?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

https://explorersweb.com/cold-blooded-mammals/

Does it count if we killed off the last of the cold blooded mammals?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I’m confused if this is in support of coconuts being mammals as plants are living. Or you aren’t aware that plants are alive.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Do coconuts hatch out of eggs, or are they birthed directly from the parent?

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 weeks ago

I… don’t know.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Seeds are equivalent to eggs

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Do coconuts come from seeds?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Are seeds birthed, or do they come from seeds?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

Nah, pretty sure that seeds come from good pirates 🤷

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

Of course not, they're marsupials

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 23 points 2 weeks ago

If you see here we have the mammal known as a coconut:

[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Coconuts don't give milk. They give water. We force them to give milk. They dont do it willingly.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

Additionally, it is known that cows are mammals. Therefore, by transitivity, we can show that coconuts are mammals. QED.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 weeks ago

Hmmm, very mammilian...

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Incorrect. It's a hairy milk carton.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

Eww hairy milk

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[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago

Ernest Hemingway has got nothing on “has hair. Give milk. Not mammal”

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago

I am convinced

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

Every coconut is a hamster to me too.

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