Am I the Asshole?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/ThrowRaFroggyFrogs on 2024-01-23 09:00:25+00:00.

I (M43) have been married to my wife (F40) for 15 years. We have a son who is 12 years old.

I really love my wife. I adore and idolize her. Seriously, she is the best thing that has ever happened in my life. I think I am willing to give my life for her and her happiness.

All this time we have been living a really happy life with her and we have never had any arguments or misunderstandings. But there was one incident. As it turned out, when our son was 8 years old, my wife had an affair partner. I didn't know about him. Their relationship continued until last year when our son turned 11. That's when my son told me about this POS. My wife was taking him home to her ap and our son saw their relationship but was afraid to tell me for three years.

It's been a tough year since everything came to light. First I dealt with this asshole, then my wife and I had a long talk with each other and figured out what brought us to this situation. We moved to another city, changed jobs. And finally, we're living a happy life again. I just my wife and I will never leave her.

Yesterday my son had a fight with my wife. The teacher at school complained about our son's behavior to my wife, my wife at home began to reprimand our son, and he only snapped, defended himself, claimed that the teacher misunderstood everything and he did nothing wrong. And all this time he did not want to listen to what was being said to him. I, of course, also intervened in the argument and defended my wife. Finally, my wife couldn't stand it and told him that he should go to his room immediately. My son snapped back: "Command your John (that's what I'll call her ex-ap's name)".

Rage immediately boiled up in me and I told our son that his mom was right and he should go to his room immediately. I also deprived him of his PS, phone and pocket money. When he asked what the punishment was for, I told him that his mom's personal life was none of his business and who was he to judge his mom. I'm a husband and I have to deal with these things. Not a 12-year-old boy

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Think_Shoe_9235 on 2024-01-23 08:51:31+00:00.

so my friend (18f) just got surgery, and she didn’t tell anyone until after she got it and she just randomly dropped it in the GC with me and a few other friends, and so of course we were spamming her asking her what it was for and why so out of the blue. She jokingly responded with “I got a BBL” and I replied with something along the lines of “don’t lie, you probably got a hair transplant because of all the white hairs on your head,” and she said “….” before leaving the GC and blocking me. My other friends in the group chat are calling me names and telling me im a bad person, but keep in mind me and her have been friends a longgg time and always joke like this. I’ve tried to contact her many times but she won’t respond. So, AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/GuessNo1626 on 2024-01-23 03:55:47+00:00.

I have the login to my boyfriends instagram to post pictures I take for him from my phone. We were watching videos together and I get a notification that his ex liked his picture. I panicked and quickly deleted the notification and removed her like. I asked him to get me a glass of water then hid his phone somewhere in the sheets in case she planned on interacting further anytime soon. I reacted so strongly because I was afraid she had bad intentions seeing as his page is filled with things relating to me. Now I feel ashamed like I should've just let things run their course and let him act on his own in response to such a small thing if he even cared about it at all.

Edit: I'd like to add that I dont at all suspect him of cheating nor was it why I removed everything. He's the best person I've met and I let my insecurity shut away the "potential conflict" of the awkward situation when it wasnt mine to begin with.

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Budget-Assignment265 on 2024-01-23 03:43:38+00:00.

I (f18) have 3 sisters, 23, and 19 year old identical twins. My mom (54) is the breadwinner of our family, she’s the cheerleading coach at a large university. All of my sisters cheered in college, but the twins for my mom currently and my eldest sister just graduated. Although my moms denies it, I believe slight nepotism is involved as there’s not a statistical way I have 3 sisters cheer there without nepotism being involved.

I cheered competitively pretty much my entire life until 2 years ago. I quit because I was done dealing with the politics on the team and the bullying I received from one teammate. My mom was supportive of me quitting competitive cheer as long as I did my final 2 school season which I did.

I had always been very skinny and I kept that way for cheer, but after quitting competition cheer and with my school stunts being pretty much nothing, I realized I didn’t need to stay skinny any longer. For the first time in my life, I ate how I pleased and didn’t feel the need to exercise an excess amount, and I gained around 40 lbs. None of my friends or family have commented negatively on my gain until recently which I was very thankful for.

As college approaches for me, I’ve decided that I’d like to cheer again. I asked my mom if I could cheer for the team just like my sisters, and she said no. She claims that because I didn’t do it competitively she couldn’t justify it and that I’ve gotten too out of shape, and she simply couldn’t keep her job if she allowed me on the team.

My eldest sister wasn’t good at cheer at all, and the twins aren’t amazing. I feel like my mom is ashamed of having a daughter with fuller hips. I called my mom out on her fat phobia, and she claims that I am fat and if I can’t handle the truth I need to lose weight. This caught me off guard because in two years of me having a more full figure she never said anything remotely like this.

I don’t want to be the only one of 4 sisters who don’t cheer in college, and I don’t want to just be a fat girl in the stands compared to my sisters cheering. My mom has apologized for her comments and has tried to say it’s more because I’ve not cheered competitively in years, but I know after her outburst that day it’s because of my figure and her embarrassment of my curves.

I understand it’s nepotism, but there aren’t a set number of spots and it’s just who my mom wants. My dad is on my mom's side and said I understood that when I quit cheer this would happen, and my sisters won’t really publicly pick a side, but they have begun to make sly remarks on my weight out of nowhere. My friends do believe I’m in the right but know they’re biased and would support me regardless. I have begun portion control and lost 4 lbs, but it won’t be enough to get to where I was. I now rarely speak to my mom and while I feel like I have some blame I don’t think I’m the a-hole in this situation. AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/LawfulnessOk330 on 2024-01-22 23:46:40+00:00.

I (27M) won four tickets at work for an amusement park 2 hours away and I am saving it for my birthday, which is a week from now. I had invited my boyfriend (26M) - yes, we’re both men - and two of my best friends; that was when I find out for the first time that my boyfriend is deadly afraid of roller coasters and dislikes pretty much every thrill ride, so he’d be there mostly to walk around the park and wait for us. I honestly assumed his ticket would be best used by another friend of mine and I asked my boyfriend if he wouldn’t mind staying behind and we could celebrate my birthday just the two of us later, doing something we both enjoy.

He was very upset that I uninvited him, because he says he wants to spend the day with me any way and because he knows this other friend I was thinking about inviting (27M) is someone I once hooked up with (years ago, before I met my bf, and there’s nothing there). I understood how this friend’s presence can bother him, but even if I invite someone else, I don’t see the point of my boyfriend being there if he’s not into coasters - it would be a waste of a ticket. AITA here?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Important-Author-689 on 2024-01-22 23:09:50+00:00.

AITA for asking my (39f) roommate (40somethingm) to wipe his shit smears off the toilet bowl after using the toilet?

So I've been living with a friend since halfway last year and he has a habit of leaving shit streaks on the toilet bowl of our shared bathroom. It's not an occasional issue - it's constant. And he just leaves it, shit smears collecting for months at a time. There's a separate toilet closer to my bedroom which I use exclusively now because that toilet is so gross (which I clean regularly). I refuse to clean his shit so that toilet just gets left to fester. The only shower is in the shared bathroom so just not going in there is not an option.

I've spoken to him a few times about this but it seems like we have misunderstood each other as we just had another sit down conversation about it and I had to fully spell it out - after you poop, have a look to see if there's poop on the bowl and if so, wipe it up. He looked at me like I was crazy and said I was being ridiculous.

Things got pretty tense and he demanded that I explain to him exactly what I expected of him - did I expect him to clean the entire bowl? Even down to the water line? Even if his hand would get wet? (I actually had to explain that I use the brush in this case). Do I expect him to wipe up every single speck of shit, every single time?

I said I was willing to compromise - perhaps instead of every single time he could just commit to cleaning the toilet once per week instead. He insisted that no amount of compromise would leave him feeling better about it because he doesn't believe he should have to do it, so he would just do it exactly the way I want, but that he would move out at the end of the lease. This is probably for the best after this exchange, but the whole thing has left me absolutely reeling and wondering if my expectations are unrealistic. AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Shoddy-Priority-490 on 2024-01-22 23:07:41+00:00.

I live in Wales and (with the right qualifications) you can go to college from age 16 (I'm 18). I had been kicked out of further education in school because I was having mental health struggles and I stopped going to class, the school dealt with me horribly. I am now studying creative media production in college and have been since September. I have 4 tutors on my course, one of which is an audio teacher who is hard of hearing. Yep, you read that right. A practically deaf audio teacher. You couldn't write this.

Now my timetable is structured OK apart from one day, Monday. On this day I have a 3 hour session in the morning with a graphic design teacher who's lovely and energetic and gets everyone going on a Monday morning, I then have a 90 minute break until a one hour session with said deaf audio teacher. Now I went to this session every time I had it before Christmas, and I realised that this teacher doesn't actually teach anything new within the session, and given that when we ask him questions, he always comes right up to us given his lack of hearing, so it's altogether a really awkward session.

Furthermore, the session is timed horribly as the end of the session is precisely when my bus back home leaves, so I have to wait a further hour or spend an extra £2.90 for a SINGLE to a place where I have to catch another bus which is always delayed due to school ending at the same time. So in the end, I decided the session is not worth going to. Not in the mind of the lecturer. He thinks that the hour is incredibly valuable (despite the fact that I can also do the work at home), and that if I persist in missing this particularly shitty 1-hour session, he will call my parents and tell them I have been missing loads of college which isn't the case as I attend all his other sessions (no matter how painful they are). So AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Ok-Cartoonist5788 on 2024-01-22 22:40:12+00:00.

Me and my girlfriend live next to an old couple that are very nosy and like to start arguments for no reason at all. This morning I took our dog out for a walk and we pass by the neighbors house everytime we go for walk, they live on the corner so the street sign is in front of their house.

Everytime our dog pees on it when we walk by and this morning after he did I hear their front door open and they both come out and the husband approaches me and asks how I’m doing I say I’m good and at this point he is standing very close and it feels very aggressive and he says ‘I like that dog. this street sign is not for your dog to pee on’.

Our dog has recently been having an issue about peeing in the house so whenever he needs to pee we let him go cause if we interrupt him then he won’t pee at all but we never let him go on other peoples lawns.

Anyways I tell him that I can’t control when he has to go pee and he said ‘you can control it, you just keep walking’ at this point I’m angry because this is not the first negative interaction we have had with him so I tell him we’re gonna keep walking now and I walk away and as I’m walking he says ‘that’s very rude of you, I shouldn’t have to clean up after you’ I just keep walking.

I make it all the way around the cul de sac to the other side of the street and he yells from his yard ‘so from now on can you just keep walking?’ I still ignore him and he says ‘you don’t have to be rude we can have a polite conversation’ I still ignore him and he gets angry and says ‘fuck you, next time I’m calling animal control’.

Like I said this isn’t the first negative interaction we have had with him and my girlfriend gets upset when I try to argue back with him so I just decided to stay silent this time cause I would have nothing nice to say and the fact that he was stood so close just felt like a power move or something.

AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/shakerrrmakerrr on 2024-01-22 21:48:37+00:00.

I (F36) have become a mother 3 years ago to 2 teenagers, Will (M17) and May (F16). They've been solely raised by my husband, Nowell (M38). They've practically been raised as if they spent their entire life at a lads' club. They run wild, they act like louts, dress inappropriately for occasions and seem to have no viable plans for the future. My husband tried his best, but he did have to work awfully long hours to support them.

My step-daughter, May has been suspended twice for not following the uniform rules and pointlessly arguing with the teachers, Will had always been beside her during the arguments, or would start acting badly after finding out his sister was in isolation so that he could join her. They seem to be very codependent on each other, Nowell seems to find it sweet but I think it's unhealthy and I've started putting up boundaries between them.

Due to their bad behaviour being influenced by one another, they no longer can text each other at school, nor can they both go out at the same time. Will isn't allowed to use the car with May there as she'll just encourage him to be reckless.

They both don't seem to care about their appearance either, though they're not slobs. Will has recently tried to grow out his hair and his beard, and he only dresses in old Adidas and Nike from charity shops seemingly. May wears clothes way too adult for her, and she always goes overboard on the make up. Therefore, I've required Will to visit a barber each month and to shave regularly if he still wants to get an allowance each month, I've also told him that he needs to buy new, more formal attire for occasions when that kind of dress will be inappropriate. May has been told she can't wear make up at school, nor can she use it too heavily whilst at home. I've made her aware that clothes that are too revealing have to be put away for when she's younger, and that I'll take her shopping for new clothes to replace them

I've also required them to set themselves a goal for the future, as their only aspiration right now is to say that they are going to become models. They have to be either studying towards a career or getting an apprenticeship. This will apply to May once she does her GCSEs.

Nowell agrees with all these rules, but my step kids have been saying that they are too restrictive and acting out against them. May will regularly argue with me about the dress code and the make up, and Will always backs her up. One of my mom friends said that it's an asshole move to enforce rules on them as they are almost 18 anyway.

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/mumadvice6933 on 2024-01-22 21:13:14+00:00.

So for context my partner and I have been together for just under 2 years but we've known each other for around 10 years since going to college together.

When we first started dating my MIL would introduce me to people excitedly about being part of the family and quote he'd "daughter in law" eventhough we are not married.

Last year everything changed. In January I had a problem with my eyes where I had to go to hospital for serious migraines and blurred vision, when I told my partner (25M) about this he came straight home from work to look after my daughter (his now step daughter) without me asking. Thankfully the doctors didn't find anything seriously wrong and I regained full sight.

Now since this incident my Mil scolded me and berated me for my partner coming home to take care of me and my daughter (he's in the army). Just the prefix, I didn't ask him to come home and he done it anyway saying that "we are family".

I had a follow up appointment at the opticians where my MIL just so happened to be there and this is where she first berated me in front of a load of strangers. Now I told my partner about this straight away and he was furious with his mother and told me that he would talk to her about it. However when he went to meet her, he didn't bring it up and she reiterated that i should have called my family as a priority.

Since this incident there have been a few times where my MIL has excluded me from family gatherings and is asking for lore 1 on 1 time with her son without myself and my daughter present.

There has been a recent incident where I had to tell my MIL for overstepping one of mine AND my daughters boundaries and I have expressed this to my partner but says he now doesn't want to get involved.

My MIL is now blaming any negative mood on going through menopause and saying she's having really low moments which is one of the reasons my partner isn't talking to her about me and accepting her current behaviour with our family.

AITA for now being cautious about bringing my daughter and future child (I am currently pregnant) around my MIL with her behaviour as she's been actively excluding me and my daughter out of family get together and overstepping boundaries that have been expressed multiple times and over crossed.

My partner is now saying he will not get involved because he doesn't want to upset his mother and be "piggy in the middle" when I have told him how much its upset me.

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Fabulous-Guava-3379 on 2024-01-22 21:04:34+00:00.

I (23f) do not want to hang out with a person my twin (23F) is friends with because we had a falling out and I haven’t received an apology for the part she played in it or even a conversation for that matter. The part I played in it was a result of what this friend did. But I ultimately had to apologize and got nothing in return.

This friend threw out my couch, and every other belonging before I moved out of our place. I made an anonymous post about it on a Facebook group asking for help and advice and I guess someone put two and two together and it got back to this friend. Which I didn’t say anything bad, the post literally said wtf do I do lol

I apologized for my part and took accountability, but my apology was never acknowledged and I haven’t spoken to that person since but my sister wants me to hang out with her for our birthday that I would have to travel 5 hours for. She didn’t even respond to my apology, just ghosted me so it’ll be awkward af.

My sister is telling me to just let it go. But I feel like I am always the one to let it go if it benefits her and I just can’t with it. She hangs out with my ex, I can’t be mad and I have to let it go. I get blamed for shit that has nothing to do with me, I get upset because Im taking the heat for something I didn’t do, but I have to let it go.

I admit I have made some mistakes. i’m human. But I always always always apologize if my actions hurt someone. But I’m not allowed to expect the same in return? I deserve an apology or a conversation, why do I have to be the one to initiate that conversation though? I already initiated the conversation by giving this friend an apology for my part but I recieved radio silence.

My sister is telling me that I’m too proud for wanting an apology and that I’m not that special and she feels like she shouldn’t have to walk on egg shells around me and I should just let it go because the person I had a falling out with has and I’m like probably because she got an apology from me and I got nothing? It’s been 5 months since the falling out, I haven’t even spoken to the friend. She hasn’t tried to reach out. I feel like I deserve an apology for her part.

I never told my sister she couldn’t hang out with her friends for our birthday, it’s just I won’t be there. I said we can celebrate another time if she wants to spend our birthday with her friends and she got mad at me saying that she shouldn’t have to choose between hanging out with her friends and me and I told her I feel like my feelings are not being taken into consideration and we can just celebrate our birthday another time because I would have to travel 5 hours to be put in an uncomfy situation that I’m not interested in and she once again told me I’m not that special and that the world doesn’t revolve around me. Am I the asshole here?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Haunting-Assistant83 on 2024-01-22 20:11:14+00:00.

My husband (M32) and I (F31) are fighting because he was telling me about something while I was washing dishes and I responded “okay.” After a few seconds he said “are you going to say something?” And I said “I did I said okay” and he said “no you didn’t” and went on to insist he was looking at me and my mouth didn’t move so I must have said it in my head. I’ll admit I had a big reaction to this but this isn’t the first time this has happened. Several times in our relationship he has insisted I didn’t speak and my mouth didn’t move when I know I did. Sure there are times when I doubt whether I was thinking something or said something when deep in thought but not for a simple word like yes or okay. I know when I’m speaking and this drives me crazy when my husband won’t acknowledge that he didn’t see my mouth move for a single short word. It seems like no big deal for him to just say “oh I didn’t hear you”. He insists it’s equally small to say I might have said it in my head but I don’t feel like it’s the same thing because I know when I’m speaking. He just called me and said “I’m sorry we fought” but I said I’m not accepting that because he’s not apologizing for what he did that actually upset me and we ended up continuing the same circular fight. I just need some other perspectives on this because I feel like he’s so obviously in the wrong here but maybe I’m the AH here and just can’t see it?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Any-Barnacle-9079 on 2024-01-22 20:08:06+00:00.

My husband and I both make over 6 figures, I make a little less than he does. He has a sales job so checks are not always steady. I work a salaried full time job that pays our health care and other benefits. Unfortunately, I have quite a bit of debt largely because he went unpaid for a long time building his career. During this time we had two kids. I have never acted like he should pay my debt. I pay my bills and half (if not more) of the household expenses. I paid half of our house down payment even though he told me he would give me money back for it to pay off some of my debt, that has yet to happen. I don’t have access to his money I have to ask if I need anything over what I can cover for the month- usually unexpected cost like medical or car repairs. But he is always questioning what I spend, if I’m using my cards, and what I am saving. I don’t spend a lot on frivolous things (I would never buy $45 dollar cup lol) my make-up and beauty products are affordable brands, my clothes are purchased on sale, but I do buy stuff for me and the kids that are nice to have- not everything is a necessity. He constantly says it is our money and we are a team. But I disagree- I think he should be the one saving for vacations and other ‘splurges’ and I should be able to spend the rest of my check as I want. AITA for telling him to worry about his money and not mine?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Massive-Strike-6273 on 2024-01-22 18:17:49+00:00.

for background info, there was a car sticking business cards on all of my neighbors mailboxes. just for fun, my (16m) and my sister (14f) went around the neighborhood taking the cards off of the mailboxes. our neighborhood is relatively small, so it didn’t take long to take them all off.

as we were passing through, we got an idea to stick all of the cards we collected on one neighbor’s mailbox.

for context, we do not like this neighbor. a year or two ago, she and her husband were complaining on facebook about our cat roaming around the neighborhood even though he’s an outside cat. he wasn’t hurting anybody or anything. but they insisted that he needed to be taken care of (even though he literally wasn’t doing anything). so she and her husband trapped our cat in a cage and drove it miles away from our neighborhood, dropping it off in the middle of nowhere. he was missing for a week or two, but we did end up finding him, and he’s okay now. the point is that she is a cunt.

so we put all of the cards on her mailbox and booked it out of there.

we went home and told our mom what we did, but she did not find it funny. she said that the neighbor has cameras, and we knew that, and we knew that our neighbor is huge bitch who is definitely not the type of person to find this funny, but our mom didn’t budge. i still think it’s funny, and my sister still thinks it’s funny, and i think this is a harmless prank compared to what she did to our cat (long overdue, in my opinion).

however, if you think we’re wrong, then we’ll go take the cards off of the mailbox and post a sorry note instead.

update: thanks for the responses. i realize now that it was a stupid and shortsighted decision, and my sister and i have since gone back to take the cards off and apologized to the neighbor for inconveniencing her. sorry everyone

edit to clarify: we didn’t put them IN her mailbox, we just stuck them on with the tape the car used to put them on ours and other people’s mailboxes, so we didn’t think it was illegal to do. again, sorry, it was a stupid decision, i realize that now

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/HedgehogDense4520 on 2024-01-22 18:14:13+00:00.

Over the weekend, my wife and I went over to my parents' house because we had a death in our family. Many extended family members came, and we had quite a spread of delicious food. My wife is horrible with names and easily gets confused, and she sort of had an excuse last night because there were cousins there who she hadn't met before. However, she was asking me names of people who I had introduced at at least two or three other family dinners, which understandably made me annoyed.

I told her who so-and-so was, and she asked how they were related, whose biological children they were, etc. I finally just lost it and told her that the response will be the same when she forgets in six months again. She sort of gasped and got this really shocked look on her face, and I sarcastically told her that I would print a diagram of my extended family later, but it would be bad manners at that particular moment. I sort of laughed to myself, but she got up and walked over to my father-in-law and barely acknowledged me for the rest of the evening. I found it incredibly childish that she decided to punish me for her obvious mental inadequacies.

When I tried bringing up the subject later, she still somehow tried to pin the blame on me, even though she kept deciding to forget this information time and again. I told her that it's annoying for me to keep answering the same questions over and over again, but she totally refused to see my point. She just kept going on and on about how I had "belittled" her and how I needed to apologize. If anyone is due an apology, it's me, and I can't help but find the absurdity of her position humorous. Today, she barely kissed me before heading off to work, and it's pretty clear that she is unable to admit that she's in the wrong, even for one second. She didn't used to be this big of an egomaniac, and I'm starting to question what I can do to help her learn appropriate behavior. I'm feeling pretty defeated. AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/space9610 on 2024-01-22 17:37:01+00:00.

The road has 2 lanes going north, a median lane for turning into businesses, and 1 lane going south. The funeral procession was in the far right lane going north. I was going south and 1 car in front of me stopped. I had never seen this before for a funeral, so I slowly tried to go around the car in front of me in the median lane. The car then proceeded to pull diagonally into the median lane, so he is now blocking the south lane and the median.

I threw my hands up in frustration and the guy in the car in front of me sees this and gets out. I roll my window down and he comes and yells at me to have some respect for the funeral. I tell him it’s a funeral not an emergency vehicle, all traffic doesn’t need to stop on a busy road. I tell him to get back in his car and he continues yelling at me.

AITA for trying to go around him during a funeral procession? It was a busy road, and i don’t recall ever stopping for one before.

I think I am the asshole for instigating the situation into an argument in the middle of the road. Im just wondering about not stopping for the funeral procession.

I live in the Midwest USA in a relatively big city if that matters.

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/AnxiousPandaGif on 2024-01-22 14:14:23+00:00.

I have played video games with my partner ever since we first met. We’ve played so many games, even if I didn’t like them. I did this so that I could get close to my partner more and try to take an interest in what they play. The only problem is I despise the way they play.

Say we start a game together that neither of us have played, I take the classic route of learning as we go. I enjoy the mystery and figuring things out for myself and doing it the way I have ever since I’ve started video games. They take the route of researching how to do everything to do with the game, gaining all the knowledge possible and (in my opinion) ruining it for themself. I see it as slightly cheating, because they get a running head-start and then end up taking the lead and doing everything for themself. I really loved Baldur’s Gate until they started telling me where to go and what to do and letting me fall into their knowledge and spoiling everything for me. I ended up just following them around for the entirety of our play through because I felt stupid for not having picked up the knowledge they did.

Another thing is modding games. They love to add mods that make the games easier or better for them to play. Adding OP equipment or spells which just makes everything too easy to do.

I don’t want to research and they don’t want to go in blind, but I ended up having an argument with them over it and called them a “cheater” for the way they played. They told me to explain how it’s cheating and I said “You don’t get to play the game the way they want you to play. You’d get a lot more out of it for going in blind.” They were very angry about that part, but I genuinely don’t know what to do. Now I feel like an asshole for even bringing it up. They spoil games for me and themselves. It just seems our gaming styles are way too separate. I fully understand if you want to do that in single player stuff, it’s your choice and you’re not affecting anyone, but I just really disagree with the way they do it.

Am I the asshole?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Enkeria92 on 2024-01-22 14:06:20+00:00.

I (31F) have lived in a private condominium as a tenant for a little over a year with a horrible neighbor directly above me. It started on Christmas Eve, 2022 when she was “cleaning” but it sounded like a construction zone upstairs. I was stressed already because my cat was sick and I remember asking her to stop the noise after it had gone on for at least 3 hours. Our condos are both 460 sq ft, so I don’t see how it would take several hours to clean a space just slightly bigger than an extended stay hotel room.

Ever since then, she’s made it a point to be as obnoxious as possible at all hours of the day/night. I work full time, run a small business, and go to school part time. She will wait until she realizes I am home to start back up and is so loud now that I can hear her over noise-canceling headphones. The property management company has told me to call the police (part of their policy) when it becomes too much, but this is an almost everyday occurrence when she is home and I’m not about to call everyday for a noise disturbance as their resources are better used elsewhere. Property management has fined her, but it’s done nothing. The police have told her to quiet down, to which she will until they leave (she’ll watch out her window).

She has also started spreading rumors that I bully her for being disabled, that I have physically threatened her, and my friends (who were here at the time helping me with my mental health) have no business being in my condo, while she’s allowed to have friends over. It’s getting to the point where I don’t enjoy coming home anymore. I just want to come home and be able to rest or do my homework in peace and quiet but I can’t. My landlord has tried to talk to her landlord and it does nothing, so WIBTA for suing her for emotional distress?

Edit: I don’t have money to just up and move as some of you have suggested. If I sue, it will go through small claims as that’s how it works where I live, which require no lawyer.

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/IndependenceHour8973 on 2024-01-23 08:04:39+00:00.

I 39f and my husband 39m have been together 18 years. Married 3. Back in Oct. He came to me about a divorce with much emphasis on its not because of another female. Yet there were already suspicions of another female because of the way he treated this person right in front of me. But I was the crazy one when i confronted him. The next day he has her number. He told her we had been separated. That it was mutual. Among so many other lies. Even ones involving our kids who had no clue. I did not want a divorce. I was trying he was not, for a long while. So I told her the truth, but I "ruined it for him". Jump ahead I gave in around the holidays. I let him back in. My mistake. He had myself and our whole family fooled. Thinking we were going to try. It was one sided. Just me..He had been hiding a lot recently. Bathroom trips every 5 minutes. Turning away with his phone, a password for the first time EVER. So I got brave. I looked. Yep he's talking to her again. Stored under "Greg". Tried to tell me it was another female. Telling her we have been separated this whole time. Buying her jewerly Tells me he never said we were working it out. He accidentally led me on. Begging me not to tell her anything. Threatening he will "be a devil" if I say anything to her. if I mess this up for him again. All he wants is to be happy. There is so much more I can add. such a screwed up situation. He confessed to her he had been in love with her for over a year. Tells me to my face she makes him happy. Will IBTA if I tell her what he's done..again

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/chooizr439 on 2024-01-23 00:51:54+00:00.

I (33F) have a two kids (11F and 8M) with my husband. Our daughter is usually a good kid, which is why we were appalled when we got a phone call from her teacher about her bullying another student.

Her teacher told me that her and a few other girls she is friends with were bullying a boy in the same grade, but in a different class at recess. A few of the boys in her class are friends with the boy, they were playing basketball at recess when he asked to speak to his friends.

He told them my daughter and her friends were bullying this boy because he is transgender. The other boys immediately went to the teacher to tell her, even though he asked them not to because he was scared of the social consequences.

When my husband and I found out about this, we were furious. It’s also personal for my husband, he’s a teacher and a baseball coach and he has a student who’s an 8th grader and is a trans boy, the boys on his team are friends with this boy and while he doesn’t play with them, he helps out with a lot of the behind the scenes stuff (like equipment, acting as a scorekeeper at games). He knows how much both his players and the trans student admire him.

We told our daughter she was grounded until further notice, she lost all electronics, she can’t see her friends outside of school, ect. It’s school and home, that’s it.

We got the phone call about a week ago. Last night, we were at my sister’s (37F) house for dinner. My daughter was there but she could only read books, no playing video games with her cousins or brother.

My sister asked what happened and I told her, and she said I was being too harsh on my daughter and that I should lift the punishment on her.

My sister’s oldest is her daughter who is 14. Her 14 y/o is a massive trouble maker, back in 7th grade, she got suspended from school multiple times for participating in the “devious licks” trend, stealing a hand sanitizer from the school bathroom and when she got back, she tried to steal a mirror. My niece also has got in trouble for bullying and recently attempted to shoplift but her brother/my nephew (10M) noticed what she did, told her, and she put it back before she got in trouble.

My sister and her husband never punish their daughter, they figure “the school already punished her enough” when she gets punished at school.

I told my sister I punished my daughter so she didn’t turn out like her daughter. I yelled at her for disrespecting my parenting. We got into an argument and it left in my family leaving early.

Later on last night, my sister called me to work things out, she demanded I apologize, but I refused to do so because I think she’s the one in the wrong, but she keeps telling me she won’t speak to me until I apologize.

AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/chooizr439 on 2024-01-23 00:51:54+00:00.

I (33F) have a two kids (11F and 8M) with my husband. Our daughter is usually a good kid, which is why we were appalled when we got a phone call from her teacher about her bullying another student.

Her teacher told me that her and a few other girls she is friends with were bullying a boy in the same grade, but in a different class at recess. A few of the boys in her class are friends with the boy, they were playing basketball at recess when he asked to speak to his friends.

He told them my daughter and her friends were bullying this boy because he is transgender. The other boys immediately went to the teacher to tell her, even though he asked them not to because he was scared of the social consequences.

When my husband and I found out about this, we were furious. It’s also personal for my husband, he’s a teacher and a baseball coach and he has a student who’s an 8th grader and is a trans boy, the boys on his team are friends with this boy and while he doesn’t play with them, he helps out with a lot of the behind the scenes stuff (like equipment, acting as a scorekeeper at games). He knows how much both his players and the trans student admire him.

We told our daughter she was grounded until further notice, she lost all electronics, she can’t see her friends outside of school, ect. It’s school and home, that’s it.

We got the phone call about a week ago. Last night, we were at my sister’s (37F) house for dinner. My daughter was there but she could only read books, no playing video games with her cousins or brother.

My sister asked what happened and I told her, and she said I was being too harsh on my daughter and that I should lift the punishment on her.

My sister’s oldest is her daughter who is 14. Her 14 y/o is a massive trouble maker, back in 7th grade, she got suspended from school multiple times for participating in the “devious licks” trend, stealing a hand sanitizer from the school bathroom and when she got back, she tried to steal a mirror. My niece also has got in trouble for bullying and recently attempted to shoplift but her brother/my nephew (10M) noticed what she did, told her, and she put it back before she got in trouble.

My sister and her husband never punish their daughter, they figure “the school already punished her enough” when she gets punished at school.

I told my sister I punished my daughter so she didn’t turn out like her daughter. I yelled at her for disrespecting my parenting. We got into an argument and it left in my family leaving early.

Later on last night, my sister called me to work things out, she demanded I apologize, but I refused to do so because I think she’s the one in the wrong, but she keeps telling me she won’t speak to me until I apologize.

AITA?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/breastmilksoaps on 2024-01-22 23:32:55+00:00.

I ordered a dress and high heels but never wore it in front of him as in my culture is consider bad luck. I was very excited looking at dresses, obviously not the $10,000 ones but $150-300 ones. We already have a baby and live together. I am a SAHM and he’s a senior engineer yet when I mentioned I wanted to buy a dress for our baby so she could also wear a dress, he said is not necessary. That we could wear whatever we have in our closet. I know he already pays for everything but I thought it was a special occasion and I was buying this with money I already had in my account. We are foreigners in the country we live in so only the witnesses arrived and the civil wedding lasted 10 minutes max. Instead of making me happy, I cried as soon as we arrived back to the apartment. He told me he didn’t know it meant so much to me and that I should’ve insisted. Well, I didn’t do that so now I wonder if I was in the wrong?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/Zoma456 on 2024-01-23 07:33:49+00:00.

Long story short, my boyfriend visited his home country for the holidays and I asked him to get me some product because it is not available where we both live and it’s hard/expensive to acquire. Thus, I told him to get it from his home country, thinking that since the product there is more available, it will be cheaper. Turns out it wasn’t. It was about 145 dollars, which is actually a lot more expensive than buying it here.

So my boyfriend decided to get anyway without telling me the price even though I asked. He knew I would say no. Then on his way back, I was causally texting him and asked about the price and that’s when he told me. I was so annoyed and mad at him for not telling me the price beforehand as he was on the phone with me while buying it. He offered to just pay for it, but I felt bad, especially coz he is still a student and I am already working. And now I realized it’s not even the product I wanted so it’s an unnecessary money loss for me. If he had told me the price, I would have immediately disagreed and he knew that I would hence why he bought it without telling me the price.

I paid the amount but I let him know that I am pretty upset and I still am to be honest. So am I the asshole for being upset?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/yuhyuhyyueah on 2024-01-23 07:28:07+00:00.

My friend came out to us and started dating a guy april last year, the guy started hitting on him while dating another guy and broke up with this guy for my friend, getting with him a week later which our friend group found very weird, he also does a lot of abusive things imo (spam texts and calls my friend, forbids him of doing things, acts like his dad yelling at him for dumb things like forgetting his keys and hold over his head the fact that hes the one paying for things instead of my friend, even though he offers to pay for everything) and i just find his pushy behavior overwhelming, but whatever since im not the one dating him. We stopped hanging out as often but whenever we do, he always brings him around, he used to ask if he could but now just does it which is very annoying, i also get annoyed that he just invites himself to our things but has never invited us to anything (including birthdays) so that adds to it but me and our other friends dont say anything because we dont want any drama, i know its kinda wrong for me not to say it makes me uncomfortable, but i know he would just get mad and last time i did say i didnt like a friends boyfriend who was also abusive she just ended the friendship, i dont have a large friend group so would just rather avoid the confrontation. Fast forward to now and my birthday is in a month, im planning it and very excited since i haven’t had a party since i was 12 (im turning 24), im only inviting a few friends that i actually keep contact with and also letting my sister invite a few friends so she can hang out. AITA if i dont want him to come, and if when its time to send invitations and he asks to come i say no?

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/mysticfox__1 on 2024-01-23 07:23:35+00:00.

My fiance and I (both 19, non-binary) got engaged on Thanksgiving 2023 after only being together for a few months. We made the decision to wait to tell our families until Christmas 2023 as a dun Christmas surprise.

When we went to see my mom, I was prepared for her to say something about it because she thinks we are rushing into things too quickly and she is a bit of a helicopter mom. When we told her, her reaction was exactly that. She did say she was happy for us but told us we should hold off on the wedding for a couple years (i.e. 2026 or later) to make sure we want to get married. We both just brushed it off and our plan is still to get married in October of 2024.

We told the rest of my close family/friends and so far everyone else has been really happy for us besides my grandmother (mom's mom). My grandma reacted the same way as my mom but has told us multiple times that she is happy for us and has welcomed my fiance with open arms so I'm not too worried.

Currently the problem is that every time I even mention the wedding (and sometimes when I don't) my mom has to bring up that we should wait to get married. She doesn't even listen to me when I tell her that my fiance is the love of my life/soulmate and neither my fiance or I can think of a way that we wouldn't be together.

It got to the point where I was physically sick with emotion because one of the things I dreamed about was going to wedding boutiques and doing wedding stuff with my mom. Like that's what mom's usually do when their child is getting married. I also have distanced myself from really doing anything to plan for the wedding which my fiance understands but we are on a bit of a time crunch so we are a bit behind on things.

I am to the point where I am currently ignoring calls/texts from my mom because I don't want to hear her thoughts about the wedding. I have also decided to tell her that if she doesn’t want to support my fiance and I getting married and will just keep commenting on it that she will be uninvited from the wedding and I don't really want her to be apart of my life anymore.

AITA for deciding to tell my mom this?

Edit: I forgot to add that I don't have a very strong relationship with my mom because she doesn't understand that I'm non-binary and that I don't like guys.